Q: I went to school to become a teacher because I love working with children and am often uncomfortable around adults. I feel like I can be myself with kids in a way I can’t with adults. Things like interviewing for a job are excruciating for me. I feel like I stop speaking fluent English and turn into a monosyllabic robot. By some miracle, though, I made it through an online screening interview with a department chair at the school and a second-round online interview with a grade-level administrator. Now the school wants me to meet with a whole panel of people in person, including the principal, and I’m freaking out. It took everything I had to get through the first two rounds, which were exhausting, and those were with one interviewer. I’m worried I’ll freeze and everything I worked for in graduate school and in my practicum is going to go up in smoke. Also, word could get out that I totally blew it and am a fool, and no one will want to interview me ever again. This would be my first real-world job, and I’ve never interviewed with a whole panel before, and now I kind of want to bag the whole thing. Help!

A: The good news is that you really want this job. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be panicking. In other words, the stakes feel high because it’s an excellent opportunity. So my first piece of advice is to reframe the situation. Right now, you view the interview as a threat. In your mind, if it doesn’t go well, the school hire someone else and word will get out that you’re incompetent. No wonder you want to opt out of the whole thing! Instead, focus on the upside if things go well. When you catch yourself being self-critical, try to remind yourself that you made it through the first two rounds for a reason, and you’re worried because you care. There’s even research showing that if you can adopt an opportunity mindset and convince yourself you’re excited rather than scared, you’ll have an easier time dealing with fear. Plus, that attitude will translate into positive energy and emotions are contagious. If you’re more relaxed, your interviewers will be, too. You’ll also be less monosyllabic and robotic if you’re focused on sharing the many reasons why you would add value to their community.

If you can adopt an opportunity mindset and convince yourself you’re excited rather than scared, you’ll have an easier time dealing with fear.

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