The birthday problem

I’ve never liked singing “Happy Birthday” — I think it’s a cheesy, awkward song. But to children, a birthday is a day when everyone is supposed to be nice to you, and the birthday song is a moment to enjoy being showered with attention.

I learned how important birthdays are to young children during the first week of my first year of teaching. It was one of Tina’s first birthdays since being adopted, and her mom, who worked at my school, asked if I could do a little something to make the day special for her. I remember Tina’s excitement at handing out cupcakes and her asking when we were going to sing. Understanding what is important to kids helps you connect with them and create a classroom of respect and trust, where students feel safe taking risks and learning. So OK, let’s do birthdays, even if they’re cheesy.

The software we used to take attendance helped me out by showing a candle next to someone’s name if their birthday was coming up. Whenever I saw the candle, I’d have a moment of panic, worrying that I’d forget to stock the prize box with cool toys or let the birthday kid down by failing to set aside enough time in the day for a mini-celebration. But, eventually, I got that birthday thing down. I made a little tradition where the birthday kid could pick any game to play in class (usually Seven Up or Simon Says) and even pick a Kidz Bop song to play on YouTube, prompting everybody to dance. I also started making “birthday bags,” filled with trinkets and candy, that I could give to the lucky student just before dismissal, as we sang the birthday song.