Q: We are about to get our mask mandate removed, and most of the staff members at my school are thrilled. I, however, have an autoimmune condition that makes me reluctant to remove my mask. That said, I don’t want others to feel that I’ll judge them for going mask-less, and I’m worried about how students will perceive my decision to continue wearing one. For instance, I worry they’ll be annoyed when they see that I’m quite possibly their only teacher to make that choice. It will undoubtedly be easier to hear and understand their other teachers, and I can anticipate that they’ll be annoyed with me for continuing to wear a mask. I also don’t know if it’s appropriate to share my personal reasons for wearing it, but I do want them to have some context for why people might make different decisions. Where do I go from here?
A: Your students likely will be wrestling with some of the same concerns, plus some of their own. Some of them may be immunocompromised like you, or they might want to protect a vulnerable relative, or they might worry they’ll stick out as different if everyone but them sheds their mask. Some students have shared with me that they think they’ll feel “naked” after two years of covering their face, while others simply want to conceal everything from acne to braces to their “weird” facial expressions. I’ve been reminding nervous students that change is hard, and that it’s OK to waffle back and forth as they figure out what feels right for them. In other words, whether you wear a mask or not, you’re going to put some subsection of students at ease and perhaps raise a few questions for others.
As for your question about sharing information, you certainly have the right to share why you will continue to wear a mask. And if disclosing that you have a medical reason for making this choice will alleviate your stress, go ahead, but share any details in a developmentally appropriate way. Underscore that others will have different — but equally valid — reasons for wearing a mask, and that no one is under any obligation to justify their decision. Some might benefit from a reminder that it’s never acceptable to badger someone for information, and that the onus is on them to respect others’ choices.
And as for anticipating that some students might be annoyed that you’re harder to understand than other teachers because of the mask, you’re not a mind reader. You can’t predict how they’ll react, and it’s OK to wait and address issues as they arise. If you’re not already using adaptive technology, for instance, you could start using a microphone. Try to see this situation less as a problem-in-the-making and more as an opportunity to build your students’ empathy and ability to consider other perspectives and think for themselves.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Phyllis L. Fagell
Phyllis L. Fagell is the school counselor at Landon School in Washington, D.C., a therapist at the Chrysalis Group in Bethesda, Md., and the author of the Career Confidential blog. She is also the author of Middle School Matters and Middle School Superpowers, available at https://amzn.to/3Pw0pcu.
