Q: I’ve been a teacher for 17 years in what I’d consider a pretty good place to work. I have had the occasional frustration with bureaucracy like anyone else, but I recognize I’ve got a pretty good gig. I like kids and am proud to do work that benefits society. I have solid benefits. Nice coworkers. A hands-off building administrator who lets me do my thing because I have a track record of getting good results. Parents and colleagues who respect me. Even in the middle of the pandemic, I recognize that I have it far better than many others.
And frankly, I’ve always been the type of teacher who kills it. Who stays up-to-date on best practices. Who gets grants to present at conferences, and who regularly joins colleagues from other schools in my district to exchange ideas. Other teachers often reach out to me for advice, and that makes me feel good. I love (or used to love, anyway) being acknowledged as among the best teachers in my school. But now I have no motivation. I’m talking zero, zilch, nada. I don’t particularly want to improve. I don’t want more professional development opportunities. I just want to skate by. I’m becoming the kind of teacher I judged harshly less than a year ago. I really just . . . don’t care. It’s such a big change from how I used to operate that it’s alarming. I don’t know who I am anymore, let alone what to do about it, and even if I did know, I’m not sure I’d bother. Where do I go from here?
A: I’d be surprised if you didn’t feel a bit different than you did a year ago. You can’t discount the magnitude of the changes you’ve experienced over the last 10-plus months. In that time, you’ve had to change how you deliver instruction, deal with the stress of living through a pandemic during a divisive time in history, and reach, teach, and comfort students who are struggling themselves. You’ve gotten a heaping dose of vicarious stress on top of your own. Not surprisingly, you’re far from the only teacher who has felt the need to press the “reset” button.
So, let’s flip the roles for a moment. Imagine a student came to you with this question. Would you conclude that their motivation was dead forever, or would you tell them that everyone is doing their best to stay afloat right now? Cast aside the self-judgment, which does nothing but drag you down, and focus instead on setting realistic, attainable goals. Make a list of your “must do’s,” “should do’s,” and “nice to do’s.” For instance, you “must” prepare for your classes and attend required meetings. You “should” partner with families and make an effort to get to know your students as whole people. “It would be nice” to present at conferences and exchange ideas with your extended professional learning community.
Even if you’re not inspired to knock it out of the park right now, there might be things that still motivate and matter to you. For instance, if your administrator has been hands off because you’re so competent, you might not want to risk jeopardizing your good reputation. It sounds like you still enjoy being consulted by colleagues, too, so consider acting “as if.” What do I mean by that? In the same way that you don’t have to like lifting weights to go to the gym, you don’t have to be ambitious to put in the work to meet students’ needs. And try to remember that this situation is temporary and situational. Don’t globalize and make predictions about the future. None of us has a crystal ball, and just look at how much has changed in the last year. (Or the last week!) I would, however, consult a professional mental health therapist, if only to assess whether clinical depression might be interfering with your lack of motivation.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Phyllis L. Fagell
Phyllis L. Fagell is the school counselor at Landon School in Washington, D.C., a therapist at the Chrysalis Group in Bethesda, Md., and the author of the Career Confidential blog. She is also the author of Middle School Matters and Middle School Superpowers, available at https://amzn.to/3Pw0pcu.
