Principal irritated that some teachers instructing virtually never come to school

Q: I’m a principal who oversees more than 100 teachers, all of whom are instructing remotely. We have been distance teaching since March 13, 2020, much like many other schools across the country. In that time, most of my teachers have stopped in at least a few times, whether they wanted to check their (physical) mailbox, pick up supplies, distribute books or math packets to students, teach from the school, or just say hello to all of us in the front office (while socially distanced, of course). There are a few teachers — and if you had asked me in advance, I would have predicted the teachers who would fall into this category — who have not stepped foot in the building. Not once in nine months. These are not people with health problems or who fear COVID, at least not any more than anyone else. These are people who never put forth extra effort or showed up for me or anyone else before COVID.

I can’t put my finger on why this bothers me so much, but it does. Can you help me get to the root of why I can’t get beyond this, and why I feel so peeved, and even feel a little contempt toward them? They come to the scheduled Zoom staff meetings, and they typically do the bare minimum but get their work done, and they’re online teaching their classes, and yet it still feels like they’re . . . getting away with something. Grrr. I can’t make them come in; I want them to want to come in. And I keep hoping that they will — all on their own. If I have to ask them, it will defeat the purpose and I’ll end up just as angry.

A: I read your question a few times so I could look for clues to your irritation. I spotted three right off the bat. The first is your comment that these particular teachers always do the minimum. Perhaps this feels like yet another way they’re underperforming. Which leads to the second clue. When you list the reasons people come into work, you mention that some come “just to say hello to everyone in the front office.” I wonder if it feels like a snub, as if they don’t care enough about your relationship — or respect you enough — to make the time to visit. You wouldn’t be the first educator to struggle with heightened sensitivity in the absence of in-person interactions. The third clue is your reference to all the teachers who do show up to pitch in with jobs such as materials distribution. Maybe you feel that some individuals, including you, are shouldering a disproportionate burden, and you’re resentful of the freeloaders.