Q: I’m a teacher and was on bus duty the other day. As streams of kids exited the school and boarded their respective buses, I overheard one of my colleagues say some nasty stuff to a fellow teacher. The comments had to do with why that teacher was never assigned to teach honors-level classes, and the insinuation was that she was stupid and couldn’t be trusted to teach advanced courses or interact with the parents of the smart kids in our community. I heard her say something about how she dresses trashy and has a limited vocabulary and how the whole department finds her embarrassing. This teacher happens to be from another culture and is bilingual, but she speaks English fluently. And while the bully didn’t directly name the woman’s culture, the whole exchange smacked of racism to me. Meanwhile, the teacher looked stricken. She was biting her nails and quietly staring at the ground, and this colleague just kept on harassing her. I was uncomfortable and my jaw was on the ground, but I didn’t say a thing. Now I feel really guilty and am losing sleep over this, but I’m on the fence about how to proceed. Would you let it go but speak up if it happens again? Report the nasty teacher to the principal and risk the woman’s ire? For what it’s worth, these are two teachers in the same department, and neither is in charge of anyone but themselves.
A: Let’s shift the narrative. Imagine you were on bus duty and you heard a student verbally assault another student, and it sounded racist, and you could tell the other kid was deeply upset but paralyzed. Would you intervene? What would you do? My guess is you would step in to stop the abuse and comfort the target. There would be much less ambiguity. You likely would report the exchange to an administrator who could hold the aggressor accountable, and the next time you saw the targeted child, you’d inquire about her well-being.
In this scenario, the exchange unfolded in plain sight. You also were within earshot of students. If you heard it, I’m sure some of them heard it, too. By doing nothing, you inadvertently transmitted the message that treating someone as “less than” is acceptable. Imagine the powerful example you could have set for the students in the vicinity by interrupting the abusive teacher and firmly saying, “Enough. Leave her alone. You’re out of line and your comments are racist.” Any child who heard you say that would know they could approach you for help if they found themselves in a similar situation. As a role model, you also might help them summon the courage to defend a bullied classmate in the future. Not to mention, if this teacher is treating a colleague like this, she’s probably disrespecting her students. As their teacher, she holds all the power. In other words, I absolutely think you should speak up if there’s a repeat performance.
The second part of your question has to do with reporting the bad behavior to an administrator. Because the targeted teacher is an adult, I’d circle back to her first. Let her know that you overheard the exchange and were horrified. You also can apologize for staying silent in the moment, which might ease your guilt. Ask her how she’s doing. Given your guilty conscience and the fact that you’re losing sleep over this, I’m going to advise you to err on the side of being vocal. That means letting the targeted teacher know that you’re willing to be a witness if she wants to report the abuse. You also can offer to document what you observed in writing if she’d like to start a file with her union representative or someone in Human Resources. I suspect you’ll feel better doing the right thing, but be aware that the principal may not be able to protect your anonymity. Be prepared to calmly explain your actions to the aggressor, and if she’s vengeful or abusive, document everything she says or does to you. Hopefully, an upstander will exhibit the same social bravery and step up to support you.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Phyllis L. Fagell
Phyllis L. Fagell is the school counselor at Landon School in Washington, D.C., a therapist at the Chrysalis Group in Bethesda, Md., and the author of the Career Confidential blog. She is also the author of Middle School Matters and Middle School Superpowers, available at https://amzn.to/3Pw0pcu.
